Friday 20 December 2013

Mud bath

I love walks! Although I am not a fan if it is raining and cold! My Mummy thinks I'm a silly dog but when you are this short with a long belly close to the ground, it can get rather chilly! 
I much prefer being a hot dog than a chilly dog!!!
Anyway I had a lovely walk today but got covered in mud! I usually walk around the puddles but mud you can't really avoid and I've been told it's good for the paws!! 
My daddy always takes me on the muddiest walks too it's great fun! I meet giant black and white dogs that make a funny moo sound! And these fluffy white toys that baa at me! The flying things are my favourite though and are my favourite to chase! They come out when you least expect it and I try to chase them but they always go the opposit way to me!!! 
This is me after my walk, my mummy loves me so much she decided to wrap me up warm and give me cuddles which are my fav!!!
Talk about lulled into a false sense of security!! 
You will never guess what she did to me next!! 

She put me in the big white water bowl, sprayed me with water! And covered me in these tickely fuzzy things (which for the record don't taste very nice!).

I was a good boy though as my daddy gave me nice cuddles and carried me to safety!! 
I do love my daddy he makes bath times fun! He always rubs me dry and tickles me after my bath! 

And then he rubs my chin which I love! 
My Kafin always laughs at me after my bath she thinks I'm really funny and fluffy! I think I look rather handsome!! 
Anyone for a mud bath???
Mum wasn't too impressed with the mess! Apparently this is just from me! But I'm not the only one who went out in the mud and how can some much mud come from little short me?!!!



Thursday 19 December 2013

It's a wrap...

Pppsssttt over here.....under the table!! Shhh don't tell anyone it's mayhem here and I am having to hide!!! The humans have been going round and wrapping up all sorts of things in sparkley paper and putting them in boxes and tying bows around things...I have had to hide for fear that they might wrap me! 

I don't fancy being a sausage roll!!! 
And anyway why would you want to wrap things in paper?! Especially food?! It just makes the food taste funny!! Anyway it had been exhausting staying out of there way! So I just passed out in front of the nice warm radiator!! 

This way I could keep a listen out for the red man who is always bringing me big presents which my mummy never let's me open! I know he is bringing them for me because I always greet him with a cheery bark! How else would he know someone is here to leave presents for?! The humans are so quiet they would never get any presents if it wasn't for me letting the red man know we are here!! 
I think he brings extra presents because I wear the same colour as him! He obviously has good taste as red is my favourite colour! 
Oh no!!!! I sat around for too long!!! They got me...
It's not even red!!!

Monday 16 December 2013

Quackers for quack quack!

Today was a very special day!
2 years ago my Kafin and Eddie brought me a quack quack from a charity shop!
I do love my toys especially soft toys and squeaky toys! 
I love to chew them and throw them around and kill them! The best part is chewing the white fluff as this is the most tasty! However my mummy human always takes it away from me! I think she likes to eat it for herself!! 
Where was I...oh yes so 2 years ago I had a quack quack it was a Christmas present and became my most favoritist toy! We would go everywhere together and it was my longest lasting toy! 
But back early this year my quack quack was chewed open and mummy took it for herself and put it in a big green box like thing outside which the yellow humans took away in a big zoomy thing on wheels! I barked at them but they didn't notice me and quack quack was gone forever it was a sad day :(
I barked at the yellow humans each day in hope of them returning my quack quack but I don't think they speak doglish!!
I was starting to lose hope until today...Today my humans brought me a new quack quack! 
They told me they found it in another charity shop, but I don't believe them. For one why would someone donate all these quack quacks and not want to keep them for themselves! And two it is so much like my old quack quack it must be the same...we have been reunited!!
Quack quack is my most favourite and I promise to look after him and lick him and chew him. I will not let the yellow space humans take him away in their zoomy thing on wheels! 
We will be friends forever. Love you quack quack! 

Sunday 15 December 2013

Feeling 'elf ful!

Well today has been exhausting! My humans decided they wanted to 'Spring Clean' the entire house! (Do they not realise it is still very much winter! I should know as I am having to make an extra effort to find warm and snuggerly places to sleep in!) 
Anyway...they were painting and cleaning and hoovering and sorting! It was exhausting to watch, so I was extra helpful and spent the day on the sofa wrapped up in a blanket.
 Just as Sundays should be!
I did help a little bit! Especially when they got out my favourite rug! It is big and red (my fav colour!) and I love to roll around underneath it and chew my bone on it (even though I'm not allowed to)! Maybe this is why they don't get it out as much anymore?! 
Anyway I must have been a good little helper as mum has brought me and elf outfit! 

I do like it although I'm not to sure about the ears!! At least I think they are ears or possibly eye defenders as they kept falling over my eyes so I couldn't see. Mum said I look cute but I quite like my own ears. Can I still be an elf with just my own ears? 
Anyway it has been an exhausting day as a little helper do I'm off to my favourite place, bed! Goodnight all xxx

Saturday 14 December 2013

Christmas Shopping

Today while Mum and Kathryn went out Christmas shopping, Dad took me into Calne as he had a letter to pick up from the Post Office. The lady from behind the counter, came round to say hello and I greeted her with lots of yowling to show I approved. She got quite excited which was fun. So on the way back to the car dad decided to walk me back through the centre of town which meant I could yowl at lots more people! Which made them all smile and laugh. 
So after we got home Mum came back and had bought me a present!


I'm not sure I approve.

Friday 13 December 2013

About Me!

Hello, my name is Mr Darcy and welcome to my blog.
I am a 4 year old Standard Wirehaired Dachshund although I am not very wiry! Its mums fault as she sent me to the vets when I was 6 months old to be 'done'! Mainly because I like to wiggle my hips in inappropriate ways. Although the operation doesn't seemed to have helped!!! Mum keeps threatening to trade me in for a new model that is actually wiry. But I'm not worried, I have them all wrapped my paw.


I am very laid back provided I can sit on someone or someones seat as soon as they have got out of it.My favourite place to lie was infront of the solid fuel Rayburn, but the family have gone 'green' and had the Rayburn removed and a Biomass boiler put in!
I love cheese. I refuse to come back when called, well why should I! I will entertain my parents by fetching a toy they throw, but not more than a couple of times. If they want to keep throwing it they can fetch it themselves.


I love to get wrapped up in a blanket or duvet, the warmer the better. Even better still is getting up for breakfast, then a quick constitutional, then back to bed again!


I hate rain and will avoid going out in it at all costs! I can't climb stairs so I have to sit and wait on the stair where I sit!


This is just some of my loving habits, I shall pop back very soon to update you all.

xx